Recently, I find myself getting shocked every time I touch metal. It doesn't matter what shoes I'm wearing, or if I have a wool sweater on or where I'm at. Sometimes the shock is so shocking it produces a blindingly bright flash. People can hear the shocks from ten yards away. We're not talking little sparks here, I'm dealing with some serious voltage. It's gotten to the point where I flinch before I touch my computer or DVD player. I use my sleeve or notebook to try and open doors. Is it possible that I'm becoming some sort of electricity man? Will I soon be required to get a costume and fight crime? Why is this happening to me? Why, God, why!?
Zap.
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