GIVE A MAN A TITLE.

It seems to me that a man's title can do wonders for his self-esteem. For instance, on the Metro North line the guys who punch your ticket are allowed to wear conductor hats. I'm pretty sure those fellows are not driving the trains, but the line still allows them wear hats that proclaim they are "conductors," which sounds about 100 times better than "ticket taker."

Following this example, maybe we should give all people with crappy jobs new titles and special hats. Take garbage men for example. Instead of calling them garbage men, let's call them "Garbage Generals" and give them some cool green helmets with silver stars on them. And store clerks? Why not call them "Masters of the Register" and give them some sort of bad-ass beret.
Toll booth workers? Give them a football helmet and call them "Road Warriors," see if they don't get a little boost of self-worth. Give janitors crowns and call them "kings of the mop." And so on and so forth.

All I'm saying is that a new title and some headgear can make a man feel good about himself.